Sunday, May 30, 2010

Growing Pains

There's definitely something in my belly. And contrary to how I feel when I'm naked and lying down, when I'm wearing a form fitting shirt you can definitely tell. I guess I should take a picture. I'll have someone do that when I get to Illinois.

Thursday, May 27, 2010


What is up with the BabiesRUs Registry? Whenever I try to register it tells me the registry is unavailable. And last time I was in the store it was down there too. But I called customer service and they didn't seem to know anything about a problem.

In other news I am BORED. My belly feels really bloated now. The days have been getting progressively better, but it was less than a week ago that I had a really bad day out of the blue, so I can't count on anything. I just need to know about the pets! As soon as those arrangements are in place I am out of here! Give me two days! I'm hungry and I'm out of milk. That's all I've really been wanting. Except that I'm also hungry, and nothing sounds appetizing. Light, gourmet-ish food. Which would be FINE if I could cook. Ugh. Maybe I can make a trip to the 7-11. Do they sell milk there?

Monday, May 24, 2010


I went to Karen's today! This is extremely exciting, I usually am not up for going anywhere. I'm still not able to go shopping or do much around the house. It still hurts like hell. It just doesn't hurt when I don't move around, and if I can make it to the car I can generally manage to get through the pain of getting where I can sit again. It's harder with things like watering the garden. I have to mess with the hose (which is heavy) and walk and then STAND. And it doesn't just hurt on my right side, although that's the worst of it, but my left side hurts sometimes, and so does my lower abdomen. Something is always bound to be hurting. If only it weren't so damn SHARP!

I want to move home with my parents. The unfortunate part of that decision is that I'm probably going to have to give away our cats. There just isn't anyone to take care of four cats and paying someone would bankrupt us. I know well enough to choose my health and the baby over my pets, but that doesn't make it any easier. I'm going to cry a lot over it. But ultimately, with my pain continuing, I need to be looked after and I can't have that alone in Colorado. And when the baby comes I need to be sure that I have the help I need because I will still be in pain after the baby is born and I have no idea how much I'll be able to do for myself. If the status quo remains I just can't stay here. It's gonna be really hard though. To give them away knowing that I won't be coming home to them. It hurts. And it's not fair. I have no idea whether I could manage them all, and the house, if I was healthy. But the point is that I'm not, and you have to deal with the hand you're dealt.

As far as I know the baby is fine. The soonest appointments available aren't for more than two weeks out, so it will be a little while before I have any news, but chances are that news will include gender!

I hurt. I'm signing off.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Most Recent Appointment

Heard the heartbeat again! That was about the entirety of the appointment. I've lost even more weight. I was hoping that I would have at least have stayed even, and I was really hoping that I would gain the weight back that I lost while I was in Florida. I mean, I didn't walk, we rented a wheelchair, and I ate as much as I could. And I still lost weight. And I haven't been able to keep anything down today, and next to nothing yesterday. Everything I've tried to eat or drink has come back up. It makes me thankful for my lactated ringers, because otherwise I would get completely dehydrated.

I had to go to the ER today. They "stabilized" me, but before I even got home my back had started hurting again and I threw up as soon as I walked in the door. Grrr. I just want to feel decent all the time, like everyone else.

The appointment to determine the baby's gender will be in 4 weeks, although I may go in to that private clinic earlier than that. They say I can come in as early as 18 weeks, which is a little earlier than 4 weeks, and David and the rest of the family could watch the ultrasound with me.

It's time to go back to sleep.